Ellie, our dog, is the friendliest animal we’ve ever had. If fact she is the friend
liest animal I’ve ever met. Ellie is an outside dog. However, we let her come in the house regularly but she isn’t allowed to roam. We have parameters in which she can move around the house. Even before she is allowed in, I usually make her sit at the door and relax before I invite her in. When I give her food, I make her sit and wait until I’m finished putting food in her bowl and then invite her to eat. Although Ellie likes to follow us wherever we go, she especially likes to go out to the shed with me; that is where I keep her treats!! Yet, before she comes in the shed she again must wait to be invited. Finally, before I give her the treat, even if I hold it right in front of her nose or mouth, she has to wait until I invite her to take it. Why do I do that? I want her to realize that living with human beings entails certain rules and limitations. Her animal instincts must be subjected to human authority. Further, it makes life much so easier for her to know that the humans are in charge, not the animal. It makes her free to enjoy life without the chaos which ensues when there is a lack of leadership.
The chaos of weak leadership is a problem in our homes too. I’ll sometimes ask a family, “Who sets the rules in the house?” Rather than Mom or Dad speak up, too often they glance back and forth to the kids and say, “We all kind of do it.” To which I respond, “Then no-one does it; it’s a free for all.” Then the parents will generally nod their heads. Parents do their kids a terrible injustice by not being in charge. Kids are supposed to be reared and trained. They aren’t meant to raise themselves or merely co-exist with the parents. Further, it creates untold emotional chaos when the natural order is reversed. Almost always, the kids lose respect for the parents as these poorly adapted kids become the ex post facto leaders of the family.
Why is this on my mind today? More and more we are seeing the societal effects upon kids of parents who are afraid to lead their families. What are they afraid of? They are afraid that the kids will be upset with them. But here’s one of God’s paradoxes: Seek to keep the kids always happy and they’ll destroy your family. On the other hand, do the right thing as parental leaders, whether the kids like it or not at the time, and you’ll eventually earn their undying love and respect. The Bible is full of paradoxes; get them in reverse order and you’ll have chaos.
liest animal I’ve ever met. Ellie is an outside dog. However, we let her come in the house regularly but she isn’t allowed to roam. We have parameters in which she can move around the house. Even before she is allowed in, I usually make her sit at the door and relax before I invite her in. When I give her food, I make her sit and wait until I’m finished putting food in her bowl and then invite her to eat. Although Ellie likes to follow us wherever we go, she especially likes to go out to the shed with me; that is where I keep her treats!! Yet, before she comes in the shed she again must wait to be invited. Finally, before I give her the treat, even if I hold it right in front of her nose or mouth, she has to wait until I invite her to take it. Why do I do that? I want her to realize that living with human beings entails certain rules and limitations. Her animal instincts must be subjected to human authority. Further, it makes life much so easier for her to know that the humans are in charge, not the animal. It makes her free to enjoy life without the chaos which ensues when there is a lack of leadership.The chaos of weak leadership is a problem in our homes too. I’ll sometimes ask a family, “Who sets the rules in the house?” Rather than Mom or Dad speak up, too often they glance back and forth to the kids and say, “We all kind of do it.” To which I respond, “Then no-one does it; it’s a free for all.” Then the parents will generally nod their heads. Parents do their kids a terrible injustice by not being in charge. Kids are supposed to be reared and trained. They aren’t meant to raise themselves or merely co-exist with the parents. Further, it creates untold emotional chaos when the natural order is reversed. Almost always, the kids lose respect for the parents as these poorly adapted kids become the ex post facto leaders of the family.
Why is this on my mind today? More and more we are seeing the societal effects upon kids of parents who are afraid to lead their families. What are they afraid of? They are afraid that the kids will be upset with them. But here’s one of God’s paradoxes: Seek to keep the kids always happy and they’ll destroy your family. On the other hand, do the right thing as parental leaders, whether the kids like it or not at the time, and you’ll eventually earn their undying love and respect. The Bible is full of paradoxes; get them in reverse order and you’ll have chaos.
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