PARENTAL PLANNING

Whenever it is at all possible, elderly parents should be proactive in planning their latter years. We should not live however we want to without regard to our future living accommodations, presuming that we’ll just move in with an adult-child. I’ve heard numerous times, “Well, I took care of my kids when they were young; they can take care of me when I’m old.” That statement is beyond short-sighted and self-centered. Parents should have a consuming desire to not be a burden to their adult-kids and most should make other living arrangements, rather than living with their adult-kids in the latter years, if at all possible. Parents who plan ahead are displaying the greatest act of love - - - for they are “laying down their own life’s” desires for another: Their adult-children. On the other hand, as I alluded to, it is very self-centered to live life with total disregard to the burden we might become to our adult-children. As I look forward, I’d rather be put in the corner of some room to “veg-out” in my own little world for the rest of my time rather than unnecessarily burden my adult-children. The mentality that says others owe us is killing this nation and when applied to the family, namely, adult-children - - - it is maiming families. Sometimes though, despite the best of intentions, it is necessary for a parent to live with an adult-child. We’ll talk about that tomorrow but the same principle will hold true: A parent should be extremely diligent to not be an undue burden to the adult-child, the spouse, or household.