Challenges

I’m writing this blog on Saturday afternoon as we prepare to go to my brother’s house for a crawfish boil. To those in other parts of the nation, yes, we do cook and eat those “mud bugs” down here. Our youngest daughter said she was going to try one today. She’s had plenty of opportunities in the past but only now has she gotten up the nerve.
Just moments ago, we got a surprise phone call from our oldest daughter. She’s at Navy Officer Development School (ODS) and this was her first phone privilege opportunity. She sounded very excited and said she is getting real strong. When someone messes up, then they all get to do pushups and such. Despite all the new challenges, she sounds very upbeat.
Anyway, the main point I wanted to write about is that she prepared hard for ODS. Although her rigorous preparation has made things easier for her, ODS is still a significant challenge for her. Their day starts at 5am. Before going to ODS, she got up every day at 5am and did her running and workout. Since getting there, she has learned that 5am is when they start, not when they get up!! They’ve gotten up anywhere from 3am on to get ready to “start” their day at 5am. Her situation reminds me of a lot of things in life. No matter how we prepare, life has a way of presenting us with more than we ever bargained for. But what if we just show up for life and never physically or mentally prepare to face our challenges? Well, I don’t have to tell you that it often makes unexpected challenges seem insurmountable. Obviously, we sometimes face challenges that there is no way to prepare for. But when we are used to facing our challenges rather than deflecting them, we have a better opportunity to endure even the most heart-rending ones. On the other hand, it’s good to remember that there are a lot of broken people who’ve endured much less than what many others have. They live life as if it is at its worst, but they have no real idea. Even so, not preparing ourselves or our children for the rigors of life makes life seem cruel even when it has merely dusted us up. On the other hand, preparing for our challenges physically, mentally, and spiritually gives us the strength to persevere through the true fires of life.

Honor System

Eileen and I went out to a farm today to get pickling-sized cucumbers. Like her mother, Eileen makes great lime pickles. For certain ones of you, yes, I’m trying to get as much work out of Eileen as I can before she has surgery!! Anyway, we hadn’t been to this farm before. When we drove up, we were surprised to see a sign which specified that purchases were to be made on the honor system. We were to choose our produce, weigh it, and then put the money under the scales. We did. The place where we pick blueberries operates the same way. We pick our berries, weigh them, and then leave the money in a box.
It’s really neat that there are people who trust the goodness of others enough to have an honor system. In this age of malicious computer viruses, security cameras, and having to lock down practically everything, it’s amazing that there is an honor system anywhere!! Are there probably ones who take advantage of such systems? Yes. Don’t the owners realize that some people are taking advantage of their trust? Absolutely. Yet, rather than focus on the negative few, they keep their eyes on the many good people.
There’s an old saying which says, “Don’t let the negative few overrule the positive many.” Although we need to remain diligent in our dealings, we don’t need to pickle our hearts. It’s good to focus on the goodness of others, and to expect people to still have an honor system.

Bits and Pieces

This blog entry will be bits and pieces of follow-up information.
After a slow start this morning and on through the afternoon, I began feeling much better. Although I don’t feel great, I haven’t felt this good in a month or so.
On our way back from Illinois, we stopped in to see our older daughter. After driving all night, we got to see her be commissioned as a Lieutenant (junior grade) in the U.S. Navy. She’s now up at Officer Development School in Rhode Island. Speaking of which… we’ve not heard from her since she arrived there!! I think they’ll let her phone home in a week or so. Meanwhile, I write her a snail-mail letter every day.
We also made it back home from Illinois in time for our youngest daughter to make it to her Band Banquet. Parents aren’t allowed to attend and I was glad; Eileen and I were both very tired. Anyway, our youngest tried out for Drum Major but didn’t get it. She was named a Section Leader however. She was very happy with that result.
A so-called friend called me to tell me that he saw completely through my statement a few days ago that I was just joking when I said that I wanted Eileen to heal properly so I didn’t have to wait on her hand and foot for another month. Okay, let me put it this way: I don’t want Eileen to be so ill that I have to wait on her hand and foot!! Does that sound any better?!
Finally, we made it to the weekend without my “manuscript” being rejected by the publisher. They probably haven’t had too many daily blogs try to be passed off as a manuscript. Rather than think that the editors haven’t gotten to it yet, I’ll presume that an editor likes it and is reading it word for word. Well, that’s the way I’ll think until and unless I hear otherwise!!

Submission

Wait; come back!!! This isn’t about women submitting to men!!
Many years ago I wrote a fictional story which paralleled my life. Those who read it really enjoyed it and encouraged me to publish it. One person in particular stands out in my mind as it was her deathbed wish. I submitted my manuscript to editors and sought to get it to a publisher. I soon found out that I had to have an agent to get it to a publisher, and worse, I had to be “somebody” to get an agent!! Well, since I’m a “nobody” it was suggested that I self-publish my book like so many authors do to get their start. I checked into it but was dismayed by the amount of the investment required and the amount of money most self-publishers lose in their investment- - - all to get their book published. Well, I have a big ego but it isn’t so big that I have to have something in print, especially if it costs an arm and a leg. The average sales of self-published authors are 100 books. Most of those are to relatives and close friends!! Worse for me is that I’d just give it to them!! Similarly, to seal my publishing ideas closed, I wasn’t real keen on the idea of having to go out and peddle books like self-publishers have to do. I simply wanted to submit my book to a publisher, readers find it very helpful, and I sell a million copies!! Is that asking too much?!!
Many of you have suggested that I publish my blog posts. I appreciate the inherent compliment and confidence. Oddly enough this past week I’ve gotten email offers from self-publishing companies who are offering significant discounts. The discounts are enough to pique my interest. After considering them, I also researched traditional publishers. I found a good one who advertised that they were accepting manuscripts. They required an introductory email and a submission of at least four chapters of the manuscript for their consideration. If I understood them correctly, they do a cursory read and then either reject it or pass it along for further review. Well, there’s one big problem; I have a series of blogs, not a manuscript with chapters!! I decided to make a submission anyway. Here’s what I wrote in my introductory email. “Over the past year I have chronicled my journey with leukemia. I've shared my feelings, insights, ponderings, fears, and life-lessons which emerged through facing this challenge. Each day, for a year, the reader journeys with me through the laughter, tears, and inspirational lessons of living life with leukemia, while gaining helpful perspectives for their own challenges.
This is not a typical manuscript. Originally written as blog posts, it is a cross between a personal diary and an inspirational devotional. While readers venture into my life, they are also stimulated to peer into their own lives and relationships.”
I submitted the email with my blogs attached on Tuesday. I titled the blog document: “Mornings with Michael.” On Wednesday I got an email back from them. It says, “Thank you for your submission ‘Mornings With Michael’. You have sent all that we require at this time. You should expect to hear from one of our acquisitions editors within the next two weeks regarding the status of your manuscript.”
It seems like I cleared the first and easiest hurdle. This is where it gets tough though. Although the chances are very high that it will be rejected (as many great works are!!!), it’s fun being in the game for the time being. I’ll keep you “posted.”

Medical Month

Eileen’s surgery date was scheduled today. She’ll be having surgery on June 29th. She’ll have some extensive work done and thus the four week recovery in which she is to do nothing, not even travel. As the doctor put it, as the result of her pregnancies she has some structures which are falling down and can’t get back up. So, they’ll go in and do some extensive work to get it all back like it should be. The doctor says there is a 70% success rate if she follows directions. Eileen’s motivation to follow directions is so that she doesn’t have to go through this again. My motivation to make sure she follows directions is so that I don’t have to wait on her hand-and foot for a month again!! Just kidding folks - - a little humor there.
My lab escapades begin tomorrow (Friday) with blood work from my family doctor. Then I start the other barrage next Tuesday (June 1st). I’ll have periodic tests through June 15th and then see Dr. Tan on the 16th. Whether the blood test results are good, same, or bad, I think Dr. Tan will follow through with the bone marrow biopsy “threat.” Even if the results are as good as I anticipate, Dr. Tan will probably still want the bone biopsy as the definitive determinant of the good results. I’m preparing myself to have it done and will rejoice if the biopsy plans get scuttled!! As I told a friend earlier today, I look forward to continued good news but I dread what I have to go through to get it!! By the way, one of the tests will be a repeat of what I wrote in my May 24, 2009 (last year) blog when I reported, “When it was time to inject the dye he said, ‘You'll get a warm feeling and it'll feel like you are wetting your pants but you aren't.’"
Hmmm, I sure hope they’re right about that again this year!!

Reaching Out

I got a note from a friend today who wondered if he had been enough of a friend to me during this period of my illness. He expressed his frustration at not knowing just what to do, but assured me of his strong friendship and love. I appreciate his letter, but, isn’t his quandary the same for us all? It’s hard to know what to do for someone when they are ill, especially with someone like me who is fighting hard to maintain his physical independence. Otherwise, unless someone wants to massage my cramping legs at night, walk the floor with me, or hold my hand while I’m vomiting, I’m not sure what more one could do!! Actually, reading my blog, sending me emails, cards, calls, and other forms of staying in touch mean so much to me. That does more for me than almost anything else, and I thank you for it.

Out To Lunch

I don’t know whether this is a good time to give a health update or not. It’s been kind of a rough couple of days. I held things together long enough to get through the hectic week but I could tell the toll was mounting. To make matters worse, Saturday evening I apparently didn’t eat the right combination of foods with my chemo. I got so sick that night that I wondered if I would ever stop vomiting. As I was hanging over the stool and conversing with the Lord, I was reminded that many cancer patients go through this every day. I only go through it that bad once in a while. So, I’m not complaining but since this is a health update, I will continue. Anyway, being so sick, took a lot out of me. I didn’t do much more than write the blog post Sunday and sleep. I didn’t feel much better on Monday but I made myself mow the yard and take care of a few other items. Accomplishing something always seems to make me feel better. Well, it didn’t work so well this time. Then, a friend called and invited me out to lunch; he even offered to pay. Although I didn’t really feel like it, how could I pass that up?!! So, he came and picked me up and we had a nice lunch and he even took me on a couple of errands afterwards. It brought more life to my systems and salve to my body still sore from all the vomiting. He came along at a good time today.
When our daughter got home from school, we talked about her day and her upcoming calendar of events. In the course of that discussion, she made the comment that a year ago we didn’t know how well I’d be doing right now. Similarly, Eileen recently reminded me that the medical literature said doing one load of laundry is a full day’s effort for those with my leukemic blood counts. Well, most days I do more than a load of laundry… and I’m grateful that I can and I’m grateful that I can push through the physical and mental barriers which want me to just lie down and quit. I’m also grateful to friends like you who pray for me and us, send me emails, call me, send cards, and of course my friend who took me out to lunch - - - and paid for it!!